I'm trying to work out how it got to be Friday. This past few weeks - well the whole month really has gone by in a blur. I can't say I've enjoyed it as I constantly feel like I'm several steps behind where I need to be. I went for a massage on wed to the best masseuse in the whole world and I don;t exaggerate!!!! Emma has the hands of God as I imagne them to be. She offers up an amazing pounding that frees up knots and kinks but she also throws in a great spiritual element - this week is was tuning forks on my spine to free up energy and get my groove moving again!!!! I love it. It always takes a few days for everything to settle down so I think that by tomorrow I should feel the full effects. Because of my odd month I haven't written. Sometimes it really is bloody impossible to figure out where writing comes in a life that already has a full time job and a normal, full personal life. What is the role of writing in all this? Occassionally I think I have it figured out and I get a regualr routine going and then along comes a hectic month and it goes out the window and then I have to start all over again in a sense.
I've booked to go to the Winchester writers conference next month so I'm using that as a starting point and some time for me to think about how writing fits into my life. I'm not expecting a miracle - I just feel I need to be a bit braver about writing. It is important to me and I need to figure out how to keep it as part of my daily life - otherwise I will never get my novel finished or the next one started or my current short story finished or my idea for a poem begun...There has to be a soloution that doesn't involve getting up at 5am!!!!!!
Monday, May 21, 2007
I've just had one of those weeks that go by in a blur and the only way you know you're going to make it through is by being super organised and keeping a close eye on what day of the week it is so you can make sure you're in the right place. I haven't written a singly word. I am so relieved that I made it through it and got all the work stuff done that I had too. But now I am shattered - I shall go to bed very, very early tonight. To add pressure to an already hectic week the tooth that the dentist filled last Monday has been aching and has required the popping of painkillers!!! I can't believe it - no fillings for 20 years then I have to have one because the dentist say so - not because I was in pain - and now the pain starts!!!! There is something seriously wrong with this scenario! I am going to be brave and ring him today - tooooooo depressing because I'll have to go back and sit in that chair with my blood pressure through the roof again - only this time I am in pain!!!!!!!
Monday, May 14, 2007
I started the week with an early morning visit to the dentist for a filling. I haven't had one for about 20 years and because I wore braces as a teenager and had regular trips to the dentist I have a bit of a phobia about it. I sat there in their waiting room this morning with my heart pounding telling myself not to be such a ninny. I thought how ironic it would be if I dropped dead from stress in the pale green waiting room as classic FM attempted but failed to soothe me. My dentist is a very nice man with a very modern surgery so I should have been reassured. Naturally I had to confess to him that I was anxious and then I apologised for being anxious because he said that he gets upset when people tell him they are anxious. I'm sure I read once that dentists have a high rate of suicide or depression or maybe both. Other than being a plumber I can think of no worse occupation than being a dentist. I have three family members who are dentists and so far they seem fine. Well the filling went well - there was no pain but I just couldn't stop my heart from pounding and actually I now feel exhausted and could hop into bed and fall asleep - but it is Monday morning and there is much work to be done - maybe I can sneak in an afternoon siesta!
Thursday, May 10, 2007
My word count has not moved. I think it's the bleak weather but I'm having a week of...well actually I'm having a busy work week and no time for writing - that is the truth. I have watched a bit of TV in the evening when I could have been writing but my brain has been a bit fried. Oh excuses, excuses. Just one of those weeks! I'll live with it and get cracking again shortly! I've been writing long enough now to know that the slump happens from time to time and sometimes it's external forces and sometimes it's internal. I've also learnt 'that this too comes to pass'. I'll be back in the writing saddle shortly. Once upon a time I would have thought that a slump meant that I would never write again but I'm past that point now - thank goodness!!! Anyway I've had a major personal project this week that has taken up time - working out how to get some downloaded music onto my MP3 player - it didn't want to play ball but I was determined as my music needed refreshing so I did some research online and solved the problem. I was rather chuffed with myself and now I have new music which has inspired me to hit the gym - so that was a good thing!
Monday, May 07, 2007
Today was meant to be a gardening day but instead it's only 5pm and I'm in my pyjamas, tucked up on the sofa waiting for the central heating to kick in. Does this sound like spring? Not to me. Though the garden definitely believes it is and is in dire need of pruning and shaping - but not today. The wind and rain are lashing against the windows. It's definitely time for a glass of bubbly. It was meant to be the reward for a hard day's toil in the garden but what the hell - it's chilled now and just begging to be corked!